The Banjo Players Must Die, page 59 by Josef Assad
<< Return to Title Details & Download60
e, the total number of casualties from the uncreation wrought by Ramses Abasiri is a disturbingly large number with more digits than is considered decent, or, more professionally expressed, 6 billion multiplied by 685 trillion.
This is the single largest casualty figure inflicted by one person since the inception of the multiverse, disregarding the time God had Mexican. Given the lack of bodies, however, it will be impossible to properly prosecute Ramses Abasiri. In any case, the instance of Ramses Abasiri in BiG-5604-POOP-4 which concocted this cataclysm is now uncreated along with his universe.
We can only hope that other instances of Ramses Abasiri will refrain from any further applications of logic; it is unknown whether even an infinite multiverse can withstand a brutal and direct frontal assault of stupidity as broad and deep as he has proven himself capable of.
The Committee recommends no action beyond a lavish and mournful memorial service for the anonymous uncreated steak.
The fools.
* * *
Ramses broke out of his trance. "Your well-endowed friend is attempting to hypnotise me, I suspect. I suppose he would have convinced me that you really are angels had he succeeded."
Ringo wailed. "George, you've RUINED it! He was just beginning to drop off! "
"I was not," said Ramses. "You gave me an erection with that lap-dance-hypnosis act of yours. Do you have any idea how difficult it is to hypnotise a man in such a state? " Ramses gestured to Ringo's bosom with his nose. "Honestly, behaving the way you two do and wanting me to believe that you are angels. Pshaw."
"But we are angels, we are we are we ARE! " whined the topless Ringo.
"Oh. That is actually rather convincing," said Ramses. He looked at George and Ringo in awe; these actually were angels. "Why didn't you put it like that from the beginning? "
"Put it like what? "
"Well you hadn't said that before, that you are you are you ARE angels," explained Ramses.