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The Love Sonnets of a Hoodlum

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Author: Wallace Irwin
Co-author: Gelett Burgess
Published: 1901
Language: English
Wordcount: 4,597 / 21 pg
Flesch-Kincaid Reading Ease: 86.3
LoC Category: PN
Downloads: 851 3873
Genres: Poetry, Humor

Corral the jim-jam bugs that madly race
Around the eaves that from my forehead jut -
Or will a carpenter please come instead
And build a picket fence around my head?


As one who with his landlord stands deuce high
And blocks his board bill off with I O U's,
Touching the barkeep lightly for his booze,
Sidestepping when a creditor goes by,
Soaking his mother's watch-chain on the sly,
Haply his ticker, too, haply his shoes,
Till Mr. Johnson comes to turn him loose
And lift the mortgage from that poor cheap guy;

So am I now small change in Mamie's scorn,
A microbe's egg, or two-bits in a fog,
A first cornet that cannot toot a horn,
A Waterbury watch that's slipped a cog;
For when her make-up's twisted to a frown,
What can I but go 'way back and sit down?


O scaly Mame to give me such a deal,
To hand me such a bunch when I was true!
You played me double and you knew it, too,
Nor cared a wad of gum how I w



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Serenity Woods
Besides writing great romance novels, Serenity Woods enjoys juggling, archaeology and celebrating Christmas next to the pool. She lives in the sub-tropical Northland of New Zealand with her husband and teenage son and likes to write books about everyday people, with the issues that affect them. As our author of the day, Woods talks about her Christmas Boxset, Three Wise Men, why she is not a fan of alpha males and reveals what readers can expect from her pen next.
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