Punch, or the London Charivari

maid!

Then we all lined up to receive the Sergeant.

* * * * *

[Illustration: Mother. "NO, BETTY DARLING, I CAN'T BUTTON YOUR BOOTS FOR YOU. NOW YOU HAVE A LITTLE SISTER YOU MUST LEARN TO DO THINGS FOR YOURSELF."

Betty. "SHALL I ALWAYS HAVE TO DO FINGS FOR MYSELF?"

Mother. "YES, DARLING." Betty. "THEN I DON'T FINK I SHALL LIKE LIFE."]

* * * * *

"TURKISH COMMUNIQUE.

Constantinople, Saturday.--On the Canadian front there were outpost duels and local fighting at several points. These skirmishes are still going on."--Evening Paper.

Forthcoming volume by Sir MAX AITKEN--Canada in Turkey.

* * * * *

From a description of a new enemy aeroplane:--

"The whole machine is armoured, and the supper part is shaped like a reversed roof." Provincial Paper.

Trust the Germans for looking after the commissariat.

* * * * *

AN EMBARGO ON INK.

Great Pu