The Handbook of Conundrums

The Handbook of Conundrums

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The Handbook of Conundrums by Edith B. Ordway

Published:

1914

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The Handbook of Conundrums

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This book presents a grindstone whereon the reader may whet his wits. It is of sufficient hardness to resist the coarsest metal of broad-bladed humor, and of sufficient fineness of grain to edge the best steel of fancy.Like all grindstones, though its form is new, its ingredients are of remote origin. It has whetted many English and American blades for the battle of ideas, and is, therefore, in places, somewhat worn. There is, however, much absolutely fresh surface.

Book Excerpt

e practice of his profession, desired to bequeath a certain sum to the insane asylum of Bedlam. Being questioned why, he replied that he had got his money of mad men, and he would give it to them again.

The trade of tooth drawer is a conscienceless one, because it is "nothing else but to take away those things whereby every man gets his living."

"A vainglorious man" was bragging that his father and uncle had founded a certain hospital. One answered, "'Tis true, but yet know that your father and your uncle were the mere confounders (co-founders) of that hospital you speak of."

It was said that corn was a quarrelsome creature, because it rose by the blade, and fell by the ears with those that cut it.

A tailor was commended for his dexterity, whereupon it was remarked that tailors had their business at their fingers' ends.

Colliers and mine-workers, it was said, should be well acquainted with all the philosophical secrets of the earth, because they had a deeper knowledge of it

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